Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
