Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Randomize
