I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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