you guys were way drunker than both of me
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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