he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
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