Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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