apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
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