its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
