The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
