Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I think I just sharted jello shots
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
