stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
