You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
