My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
