My nipple is on Facebook.
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
