So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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