Dude my mom stole all your condoms
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
