Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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