I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize