Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
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