whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
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