Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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