Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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