This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
