I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Randomize
