The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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