Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Someone signed my nipple.
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