Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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