her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
And the cops told us we were all naked.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
