singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Randomize
