Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Blood and glitter go together right?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Randomize
