It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
