I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
it was like eating out sand paper
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize