1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Randomize
