just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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