Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
