the new term for farting is butt boxing.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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