Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Randomize
