a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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