No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
