the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
