Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
This toilet bowl is my home.
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