Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I could make wine with my vomit
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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