Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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