just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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