I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
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