yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
