my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize