Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Found your dick twin last night
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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