Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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