My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
