VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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